peaks and valleys, highs and lows. some days are most excellent, others feel like a slow, uphill journey. i wasn't ready to stop working. i wasn't ready for discomfort on a daily basis. having my journey recharted without my permission was not part of the plan.  i know it is just a moment and the moment will pass, but i miss it, the things i took for granted like brushing my hair, pruning flowers, mixing and stirring with the dominant hand, and snapping shots with a heavy dslr. the classes i want are waitlisted. i'm already halfway through the textbooks anyway. the forward movement feels like reverse. i'm trying to remain patient. this is the time i have to give myself to other causes like volunteering, and that is good, but this "in between" is a lot harder than anticipated. 

ltm book

so pretty! the 2013 ltm book is finished and being printed as i type. here is a nice little widget of this lovely book...

undaunted by the limitations

reality: shooting with the heavy but reliable 5DMkii is no longer an option. well, i *can* technically still shoot with it. but i physically regret it for days afterwards. the full frame and lovely but weighted glass is outside of my range of options at this time. case in point: using the Mkii was out of the question for our europe trip. a bucket list without my gear??? 
i resorted to renting a tiny little throwback, which was able to be set to manual like the old school 35 mm cameras i learned on. all of my european photos were made with this little fujifilm, which, although i quietly bemoan its lack, this x-line family of cameras may actually prove itself to be a contender for my post-dslr life. timing could not be better with the selection of hybrid digital cameras out there that aren't exactly dslr's, but *are* completely controllable, and have interchangeable lenses. i must be creative and think sharp, light, and quality glass instead of being daunted and disappointed in the change of events beyond my control. to no longer create images? not an option. to adapt and find equipment that works for my limitations? yes.
the hunt continues.

sleep, upgraded

at some point life changed and "things" became less valuable. what matters most now are relationships; true, lasting ones. and time. and clean water, clean air, and faith.

and quality sleep.

once upon a time we were a couple. then we multiplied. the babies grew into kids and the kids grew to become larger than their mother but the beds had not been upgraded. the daddy decided it was high time said children had new mattresses, twin xl's to accommodate their adult-sized bodies. but the bed frames were too small, so he rebuilt the frames. the mommy ordered a door to paint for a headboard, and the parents finally enjoyed a new mattress too.

and the sleep was a beautiful thing. :)
photos by ipad.


bucket l*st trip

finding it hard to post this one, which is so strange. taking a bucket-list trip with my daughter should be something i want to tell the world about, in all my excitement over it. instead, i want to keep the memories deep and protected inside, as if by revealing them they may disappear. such a strange place to be. but i will say this...our trip was everything we could have wanted, and more. we traveled about 8,500 miles from san francisco to canada to london, to guernsey, around england to ireland, northern ireland, scotland, france, and back to england. the princess (cruises) truly let us escape, and the young prince was born during our time in london. to have been where my family literally left from the shores of ireland to the u.s., to be at the church they were baptized, to sail on the celtic sea and pass hedgerow upon hedgerow in the irish and scottish countryside filled me up. being there with my daughter puts me over the moon. will we return? oh, yes - and the next time, with my honey. 

thank you for this. my happy place - guernsey. photo credit: sarah

pebbly beach goodness

and the pleasures of our beach visit by the girls. maddy's view...

 and my favorite of the day, by sarah. thanks girls. love you so!

coastal excursion: sonoma state beach

schoolhouse beach, sonoma county with dear friends. finding the perfect pebbly beach just past the twisting russian river and farms, 20 degrees cooler at the coast during the peak of our indian summer. even if only for a day to reconnect, then for this day we are thankful.